Well hello there.
It's been a loooong time since I've visited this blog or even given thought to writing on it. A LOT has happened since I've last wrote and by A LOT I mean a lot. I don't really feel at this time like going into much detail because frankly I don't have the energy and I've used a lot of my talking up to doctors and counselors. However, I will catch you all up enough so that you understand what I'm talking about here.
As we all know, Jason and I have been trying to conceive for around 4 years, obviously unsuccessfully. I've checked out good. Jason finally had his biopsy in March, and was officially diagnosed with Stertoli Cell Only Syndrome. For the record (and I know this may come off as TMI to a lot of people, especially family) but I want to clarify something because of the looks I get. When I say that means there is no sperm produced, that's just it, there is no sperm. NOT semen , it's different... go back to sex ed. The semen analysis checked out perfect; except, well, the main ingredient that we need is missing.
It was a tough blow...finally knowing that it was official and there is not one damn thing we can do about it. We went dormant on the issue , then dabbled with the thought of adoption. After doing research and connecting with a few agencies, we realized adoption was not for us and the cost alone put it to a screeching halt. We had been very close to doing an embryo adoption before and one day I saw a friend's picture of her little girl (whom she was blessed with through embryo adoption). Jason and I talked and decided that, indeed, that was the route that was right for us all along. We had went to a free seminar through a fertility clinic in Grand Rapids over a year ago to check out their embryo adoption program. I gave them a call and we got an appointment scheduled in June to discuss becoming candidates for the program.
Our appointment went well, we passed all the "tests" and told we could become patients and get into the program and on the waiting list. We paid our down deposit to ensure a spot on the list and told we would hear from them in about 9 to 12 months, give or take. We were number 30 and the wait depended on the supply of embryos available and the other couples ahead of us, using them or passing on them and so many other things that don't really make a difference to this story, except that it may be a hell of a wait. I knew it would be a long time but I still came in through the front door everyday and always checked the phone for a flashing light. Then in August we got a call that we were progressing pretty fast on the list ...however, I am still slightly confused because we actually aren't all that far up. They told us that we could schedule our appointment for our nurse consultation and the mock transfer/sonohystogram. The mock transfer/sonohystogram was an ultrasound where saline was instilled into the uterus to check the size, shape and measurements to make sure everything looks good and so they would know where to "shoot the babies to" when it came time to do the actual procedure. The nurse consultation was to go over medications, time frames of medications/check ups and a lot of paper signing. A few days before the appointment we were presented with a profile of embryos even though we were technically still considered pretty low on the list. This set came from another clinic in Grand Rapids that was merged with this clinic, so there wasn't as much information and history on them as this clinic gets from their donors. Knowing what we wanted and were looking for and doing the research on this, both now and in the past, we knew what information they provided was enough to make us comfortable in accepting them. And that's what we did. We told them OK, we'll take them! Someone has to give these little ones a chance and we will!
Given a rough estimate and that things go according to plan our transfer/procedure date will be late November.
OK, so now I'm going to answer (hopefully) all the questions you have...
When a couple goes through IVF (in vitro) they may have left over embryos frozen in storage, couples are now donating them for other couples to use. It legally can not be called an adoption due to laws and crap so that's more of a blanket term or easier way to put it so people understand. Pretty much I will be able to carry and experience pregnancy of my adopted child. These embryos are 2 day old babies consisting of four cells, they were made from the eggs and sperms of that couple to form these teeny, tiny little frozen babies. I will go through a procedure almost identical to a mom who has done in vitro with what they call a "frozen cycle", yup there's another little bit of info for you, not all in vitro babies are "fresh cycles". Anyways, I'll be on about a month and a half of various medications to prepare my body and mock a pregnancy in hopes that one of the three embryos they put in will attach and find a home for the next nine months! The babies will be thawed out the day before the procedure and then I'll go in that morning and undergo a sterile procedure where they are inserted in just like with in vitro. I know this is pretty new and unheard of to the majority of people, so I don't mind the questions but I hope that this may help people to understand. To everyone that gets to deal with me these next two months I apologize in advance. I'll be on a lot of hormones, rigid time schedules and under stress. I know not everyone will fully understand why we chose this route but we did and we have our reasons and our whys and we ask that you just accept that that is the way it is and support us in this journey. We will take any and all prayers, blessings, good thoughts, best wishes, blown on eyelashes & dandelions, and crossed fingers and toes that we can get. Thanks and love to you all, XOXO.
P.S. I'll try to update and keep track of this whirlwind of journey we are about to embark on!
*Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen! *
